Top 10

Top Ten Ways John McCain Can Appear More Youthful
Top Ten

10. Campaign in a batsuit

9. Instead of Lincoln, pepper speech with quotes from Broday Jenner

8. Get his Miracle Ear pierced

7. Stop yelling at reporters to get off his lawn

6. Play breakdancing vice principal in "High School Musical 3"

5. Take a page from Jason Giambi and grow a cool moustache

4. Wrestle a gator

3. Change name of "Straight Talk Express" to "J-Dawg's Booty Wagon"

2. Stop promising a Packard in every garage and a goose in every icebox

1. Never hurts to nail a few interns